Of poop and poop

8:00 am

Gorky:
(Streeeeeeeetch!)
Ahh... It was still so early in the morning and my human left, didn't even make time to eat his food. At least he gave me my own food. I was still groggy, sleepy, eating my breakfast, when I hear that pug bumbling around and snorting upstairs. Hunf. As usual, I tried not to pay much attention to it. Today looks sunny, it will be a good day to stretch in the driveway, sunbathe for a while before I start chasing around some bugs or squirrels, or go see the cats around the neighborhood. It will be a good, good day...

8:30 am

Huxley:
Ugh? ah? Oh boy! Oh boy! It's morning! My favorite! Where did momma go? Oh boy! That door that was closed for a long time is open now! Oh boy! Oh boy! (sniff sniff sniff) Hmmm, fluffy clothes on the floor! Hrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhh.. aaahhh!! Oh boy! That was a biiiiiig poop! My favorite! Oh, cat! Hi friend! Friend? (!) ai ai ai ai!!! Momma momma! Oh boy, we're going outside? Oh boy! Oh boy! My favorite!

Gorky:
*$#$%^ pug! I thought I heard its inept stumbling noises into my room! And indeed, when I get upstairs to check it out, there he is! Taking a huge *$#$%^ dump right there in MY territory! And the idiot just kept sniffing its own shit while I stared him down with rage. When it noticed me, it came up with its squished up face directly for my butt. "Come one stumble closer and I'll scratch the ugly off your snout, *$#$%^ pug!" Ha! Teach it a lesson not to intrude in my territory again! But what about that big turd it left right there? Only thing to do is to assert my own territoriality over and above it. And this time, I won't just mark it with my pee, I'll even try to out-do him with my own poop! (shhhhhhhh..... hhhhmgh!) Awww... how can that pug be barely my size but poop three times as much?! At least there's plenty of pee here to scent up the entire room. (!) But I better rush out now that its human is leaving the house too, otherwise, no sunbathing for me! Swooooosh past that pug it didn't even see what happened! Fool.